The Jump

There’s nothing for it, but to jump.

Peering over the edge, I almost hesitate. It’s a long way down.

Behind me, some of my friends, well, I say friends but…they’re gesturing wildly, their lips are moving but I can’t make out what it is they’re saying.

There’s a silence in my head, a kind of calm that washes over me.

I’ve pictured this so many times.

I’ve been wanting to do it for a while.

I wonder how long it’ll take till I hit the ground.

I wonder how it will feel. What I’ll be thinking – will my life flash before my eyes? Will I have time to think?

How quick will it be?

If I don’t jump now, I’ll always regret it. I’ve regretted it so many times already.

One last look, and I hurtle myself into nothing. My body arcs out, far and high, like a high-dive Olympian. Or so I imagine.

Seconds feel like years.

It doesn’t feel like falling. But I am. I’m falling.

My heart’s in my mouth and I’m petrified and thrilled. This is the most excited I’ve felt in years.

Below, I see people waiting. They can wait. The end will come soon enough.

The wind rushes, tugging harshly on my clothes. My limbs are flailing, but I manage to bring one hand close.

I pause before deploying the parachute.

I really must do this again sometime.

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